I know it's been a while since I have posted anything. I really havent had much time to write I've been very busy. As of right now I am sitting in the top floor of Salzburg College in Salzburg, Austria. Austria is a beautiful city, I must say that it really annoys me that it rains a lot here and that it randomly get's cold and then really hot. Other then the weather Austria is a very nice place, it's very fun! I have met some wonderful musicians here and they are all very talented and have the same aspirations that I do.
I have been thinking lately, and I have found that my life is pretty amazing. It is very sad to admit that taking a break from religion and God was one of the best decisions that I have made. Don't get me wrong I think God and religion are great things, but I needed to cleanse and find my own truth and meaning of things. I think that I am finally ready to make my own religious decisions. It will take some time to fully develop my own idea, and claim a religion, if I get to that point, but then again, religion and the road to truth is a lifetime process, and I am ok with that.
I am slowly becoming more and more confident with myself, with who I am, how I look, how I act, and I love this. The religion and beliefs that I had were, a lot of times, setting me back and putting myself down. I honestly think that religion should make you feel better about yourself, and not put you down. As I become more confident with myself I feel the need to try to help others and impart my new found happiness to them. I realize that I am not the most qualified person, but we can all help each other.
I have been contemplating the idea of some sort of gay-activism at Southern. When I got to southern I remember being a depressed little boy who felt out of place, I felt completely lost. And now that I have found myself I want to prevent other gay/queer people from feeling like this. I realize that many people are at different stages of their coming out process and that's ok, but I want to give the image, the idea that they are not alone, that there are other people that if they need to, they can come too. Even though I am not a complete avid Jesus follower at the moment, I would like to show them, that in reality, the Jesus I have met loves EVERYONE, and in the end he does accept you for who you are. I think I refuse to believe in a God that does not love his sons and daughters for who they are. I will give this gay-activism/gay-straight-alliance idea more thought. I know that Dr. Stanley Stevenson is a great resource for gay people at southern. I have personally had the opportunity of chatting with him and he was a great resource, listener and friend.
I would please ask, that if you do read this and you think that starting something at Southern is a good idea, that you comment and let me know that I will have some sort of support. It is just scary at times that there will be some sort of repercussion, or very strong homophobic people that will cause some sort of damage.
TO MY ANONYMOUS READER:
IF you go to southern I know you can find my e-mail in access, you should send me an e-mail some day I'd like to talk to you more in depth, I mean if you'd like you could open an anonymous email and we can chat through there.
